blog d'amour

Today is the day.

It really doesn't seem real.

     In a few hours, I will be sitting on a bird above the clouds heading to London. I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to be feeling right now. I've imagined and anticipated this moment for months. I envisioned myself emotional and excited, unable to sleep the night before.
      Surprisingly, I did sleep - and peacefully at that. Although, I did wake at 7 am - I still slept which is big for me considering I usually toss and turn the night before over the most insignificant details of my life.
      This massive roller coaster of emotion my friend Molly so perfectly described to me when explaining her study abroad experience has come to a holt the past two days - saying good-bye to my sister, my best friend, and my home, I expected to be teary-eyed and anxiety-filled but instead I felt strong and clear-minded which I think proves already that no matter how hard I try, I really cannot anticipate anything about this experience. As many times as I've laid in the grass of College Green or on my bed in Iowa City, listening to classical French music, and watching myself in my minds eye thrive in one of the most romantic cities in the world - I can never know what is going to happen or how I will feel. Even though, I've prepared myself for the lonely nights as much as I have the blissful ones, I really have no idea what I am about to get myself into.
      I feel as though I've already learned so much about myself in the past few months in preparation for this trip and I haven't even stepped onto the plane.
      So ready for this - so ready to let go of every attachment, expectation, fear, control, and doubt that would hold me back in any way. Bring it on, universe!